Invader 
Post by SilverSergyon13 on May 20, 2006 18:21:42 GMT -5
*NOTE: I didn't write this. I do, however, find it hilarious*
I don't know how long this webpage will be up before members of a certain governmental agency discover this site and shut it down because of the shocking secrets revealed herein. THEY don't want you to know The Truth! Right now I can hear the rotor blades of a black helicopter circling above, but I digress.
The irrefutable evidence that I present before you, proves, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that "The X-Files" is nothing more that a rip-off of Scooby Doo!
When you really think about it, Fox Mulder is nothing more than a bizarro mutation of Shaggy, Freddy, and Scooby! Mulder has the geekiness and akwardness of Shaggy, yet posses the rugged good looks of Freddy and has a strinking resembalance to Scooby (especially around the nose). Not to mention the strange similarities between Scooby's name and Fox's nickname, "Spooky" Mulder! Scooby... Spooky... Scooby... Spooky... you do the math! And isn't it true that Scobby Doo and Shaggy are the first ones to believe, without question, anything that involves the supernatural? Hmm... does this sound like anyone we know? No, Church Lady, it sure ain't SATAN!
On the other hand, Dana Scully is nothing more than a combination of Daphne and Velma! Add one ripe Daphne and a dash of Velma, and voila, you have one delicious Scully! Scully has the fiery red hair and beauty of Daphne combined with the wit and intelligence of Velma. Now wouldn't you want to see Scully in Daphne's sexy little purple mini-skirt? And how "coincidental" is it that "Dana" and "Daphne" AND "Velma" all share the letter "a" in their names?! "Coincidental", indeed! Not to mention, doesn't it sound like a girl named "Dana" would hang out with girls named "Daphne" and "Velma"? Furthermore, while Shaggy and Scooby want to believe, Daphne, Velma, and Freddy still remain skeptical of anything "supernatural." It is their job to disprove and debunk the "supernatural" as a fraud, a hoax, or an ever-encompassing conspiracy. Sound familiar?
And the most shocking revelation: Scrappy doo (a.k.a. "The Yoko Ono of Saturday Morning Cartoons" and "The Anti-Scooby") is nothing more than a hideous incarnation of both Cigarette-Smoking Man and "Ratboy" Krycek! It's just too upsetting! I can't even talk about it anymore.
As I have mentioned before the eerie connection of Scooby's and Spooky's names, the name game becomes even stranger as one digs deeper. Examine: Shaggy... Scooby... Scully... Scrappy... Spooky... Shaggy... Scooby... Scully... Scrappy..Spooky... Try saying that ten times fast! Notice how they all start with "S", followed by the double repetition of letters, and end in the letter "y". Sure, its just some sort of cosmic "coincidence" that can be explained scientifically... NOT!
And who exactly pays for all the food that Shaggy and Scooby scraf down? And why do they never manage to gain a pound? And who pays for all the gas for the Gang to "randomly" travel around the country and the world solving mysteries? Sure, you could say they saved money by never changing and never washing their clothes, but that doesn't explain how they could afford all those ScoobySnacks! Isn't it odd that the Gang never received any monetary rewards for solving any Unsolved Mysteries? And how peculiar that these so-called "kids" don't have parents or homes or jobs, nor do they even bother going to school (except for that occaisional groovy sock-hop held in the middle of nowhere)! On top of that, they don't even sing or play in a rock band! So where does all their income come from?!
Furthermore, isn't it "coincidental" how Scooby and the Gang always seems to stumble upon the supernatural by "accident"? Sore, I'll concede bumping into the giant Hawaiian stone statue, Mano Tiki Tia, as "coincidental," but that still doesn't explain all the witches, ghosts, aliens, UFOs, vampires, werewolves and your standard everyday neighborhoodmonsters that the Gang always seem to happen upon by mere "accident"! okay, so the Gang never met El Chupacabra, but isn't it odd that these "meddling kids" always seem to solve the mystery by exposing the so-called "supernatural" as a fraud, a hoax, or an ever-encompassing conspiracy?!?
I, for one, this these are too many "coincidences" to be Kosher! Now, this wouldn't be so ridiculous if Scooby Doo and the Gang were actually covert secret agents posing as "pesky kids and a dog" and working for a secret governmental agency in charge of investigating the supernatural! Obviously the gang must have been in their thirties like those wacky "kids" on "Beverly Hills 90210"! Trying to be hip, groovy, far out, and out of sight, these thirty-something squares wear ascots (sorry Freddy, you're not fooling anytone!) and drive around in the psychedelic Mystery Machine. Despite its deceptively retro look, the Mystery Machinr has to be hiding more sophisticated machinery behind those seemingly featureless gray walls! Wherever and whenever there's an S-file, the Gang is sent to investigate and debunk the hoax! Underneath the veil of hilarity and hi-jinks lies the shocking conspiracy! So true and so shocking, isn't it?
Scooby... a talking dog with human vocal cords who can walk erect on his hind legs, use an opposable thumb and comprehend complex thought processes?! Can we all say, "Secret Governmental Genetic Engineering Experiment"? I knew you could! Interesting, isn't it, that NASA would bestow the name of "Scooby" on a rock on Mars... And what exactly are the ingredients in those ScoobyScnacks that would turn Scooby into a junkie and willing to do anything for a snack? Ever notice how these "snacks" always seemed to induce euphoria in Scooby? Obviously, they must have been puppy uppers used to manipulate Scooby into doing the Government's bidding! Not even Mentos can do that! Sinister, indeed!
Finally, here's some food for thought: if you added a groovy 70's soundtrack to "The X-Files" and had Mulder occasionally exclaiming "ZOINKS!" while Scully exclaims, "JINKY!" how similar would the so-called X-Files be to an episode of Scooby Doo? The implications are frightening!
As you can see, the life and times of Scooby Doo and the Gang eerily parallels those of Scully and Mulder! I hypothosize and theorize that Mr. Chris Carter, creator of "The X-Files", was smoking something wicked (possibly some ScoobySnacks) one Saturday morning and caught Scooby Doo. In his altered psychadelic state, he created "The X-Files" by ripping off Scooby Doo! Can't you imagine Mr. Carter tripping out on Scooby Doo and saying, "Whoa, dude... a talking dog... far out, man!" And, in fact, don't Mr. Carter's initials, "CC", really stand for "copy cat"?! Sure, all my proof is built upon hearsay, supposition, conjecture, and circumstantial evidence, but that doesn't mean it ain't true! Mr. Carter will deny all of this, but it woulddn't be much of a conspiracy if he acknowledged the trutht, now would it? Yes, the Truth is out there, and it says that "The X-Files" is a pathetic imitation of Scooby Doo! Don't let THEM silence the truth!
I don't know how long this webpage will be up before members of a certain governmental agency discover this site and shut it down because of the shocking secrets revealed herein. THEY don't want you to know The Truth! Right now I can hear the rotor blades of a black helicopter circling above, but I digress.
The irrefutable evidence that I present before you, proves, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that "The X-Files" is nothing more that a rip-off of Scooby Doo!
When you really think about it, Fox Mulder is nothing more than a bizarro mutation of Shaggy, Freddy, and Scooby! Mulder has the geekiness and akwardness of Shaggy, yet posses the rugged good looks of Freddy and has a strinking resembalance to Scooby (especially around the nose). Not to mention the strange similarities between Scooby's name and Fox's nickname, "Spooky" Mulder! Scooby... Spooky... Scooby... Spooky... you do the math! And isn't it true that Scobby Doo and Shaggy are the first ones to believe, without question, anything that involves the supernatural? Hmm... does this sound like anyone we know? No, Church Lady, it sure ain't SATAN!
On the other hand, Dana Scully is nothing more than a combination of Daphne and Velma! Add one ripe Daphne and a dash of Velma, and voila, you have one delicious Scully! Scully has the fiery red hair and beauty of Daphne combined with the wit and intelligence of Velma. Now wouldn't you want to see Scully in Daphne's sexy little purple mini-skirt? And how "coincidental" is it that "Dana" and "Daphne" AND "Velma" all share the letter "a" in their names?! "Coincidental", indeed! Not to mention, doesn't it sound like a girl named "Dana" would hang out with girls named "Daphne" and "Velma"? Furthermore, while Shaggy and Scooby want to believe, Daphne, Velma, and Freddy still remain skeptical of anything "supernatural." It is their job to disprove and debunk the "supernatural" as a fraud, a hoax, or an ever-encompassing conspiracy. Sound familiar?
And the most shocking revelation: Scrappy doo (a.k.a. "The Yoko Ono of Saturday Morning Cartoons" and "The Anti-Scooby") is nothing more than a hideous incarnation of both Cigarette-Smoking Man and "Ratboy" Krycek! It's just too upsetting! I can't even talk about it anymore.
As I have mentioned before the eerie connection of Scooby's and Spooky's names, the name game becomes even stranger as one digs deeper. Examine: Shaggy... Scooby... Scully... Scrappy... Spooky... Shaggy... Scooby... Scully... Scrappy..Spooky... Try saying that ten times fast! Notice how they all start with "S", followed by the double repetition of letters, and end in the letter "y". Sure, its just some sort of cosmic "coincidence" that can be explained scientifically... NOT!
And who exactly pays for all the food that Shaggy and Scooby scraf down? And why do they never manage to gain a pound? And who pays for all the gas for the Gang to "randomly" travel around the country and the world solving mysteries? Sure, you could say they saved money by never changing and never washing their clothes, but that doesn't explain how they could afford all those ScoobySnacks! Isn't it odd that the Gang never received any monetary rewards for solving any Unsolved Mysteries? And how peculiar that these so-called "kids" don't have parents or homes or jobs, nor do they even bother going to school (except for that occaisional groovy sock-hop held in the middle of nowhere)! On top of that, they don't even sing or play in a rock band! So where does all their income come from?!
Furthermore, isn't it "coincidental" how Scooby and the Gang always seems to stumble upon the supernatural by "accident"? Sore, I'll concede bumping into the giant Hawaiian stone statue, Mano Tiki Tia, as "coincidental," but that still doesn't explain all the witches, ghosts, aliens, UFOs, vampires, werewolves and your standard everyday neighborhoodmonsters that the Gang always seem to happen upon by mere "accident"! okay, so the Gang never met El Chupacabra, but isn't it odd that these "meddling kids" always seem to solve the mystery by exposing the so-called "supernatural" as a fraud, a hoax, or an ever-encompassing conspiracy?!?
I, for one, this these are too many "coincidences" to be Kosher! Now, this wouldn't be so ridiculous if Scooby Doo and the Gang were actually covert secret agents posing as "pesky kids and a dog" and working for a secret governmental agency in charge of investigating the supernatural! Obviously the gang must have been in their thirties like those wacky "kids" on "Beverly Hills 90210"! Trying to be hip, groovy, far out, and out of sight, these thirty-something squares wear ascots (sorry Freddy, you're not fooling anytone!) and drive around in the psychedelic Mystery Machine. Despite its deceptively retro look, the Mystery Machinr has to be hiding more sophisticated machinery behind those seemingly featureless gray walls! Wherever and whenever there's an S-file, the Gang is sent to investigate and debunk the hoax! Underneath the veil of hilarity and hi-jinks lies the shocking conspiracy! So true and so shocking, isn't it?
Scooby... a talking dog with human vocal cords who can walk erect on his hind legs, use an opposable thumb and comprehend complex thought processes?! Can we all say, "Secret Governmental Genetic Engineering Experiment"? I knew you could! Interesting, isn't it, that NASA would bestow the name of "Scooby" on a rock on Mars... And what exactly are the ingredients in those ScoobyScnacks that would turn Scooby into a junkie and willing to do anything for a snack? Ever notice how these "snacks" always seemed to induce euphoria in Scooby? Obviously, they must have been puppy uppers used to manipulate Scooby into doing the Government's bidding! Not even Mentos can do that! Sinister, indeed!
Finally, here's some food for thought: if you added a groovy 70's soundtrack to "The X-Files" and had Mulder occasionally exclaiming "ZOINKS!" while Scully exclaims, "JINKY!" how similar would the so-called X-Files be to an episode of Scooby Doo? The implications are frightening!
As you can see, the life and times of Scooby Doo and the Gang eerily parallels those of Scully and Mulder! I hypothosize and theorize that Mr. Chris Carter, creator of "The X-Files", was smoking something wicked (possibly some ScoobySnacks) one Saturday morning and caught Scooby Doo. In his altered psychadelic state, he created "The X-Files" by ripping off Scooby Doo! Can't you imagine Mr. Carter tripping out on Scooby Doo and saying, "Whoa, dude... a talking dog... far out, man!" And, in fact, don't Mr. Carter's initials, "CC", really stand for "copy cat"?! Sure, all my proof is built upon hearsay, supposition, conjecture, and circumstantial evidence, but that doesn't mean it ain't true! Mr. Carter will deny all of this, but it woulddn't be much of a conspiracy if he acknowledged the trutht, now would it? Yes, the Truth is out there, and it says that "The X-Files" is a pathetic imitation of Scooby Doo! Don't let THEM silence the truth!
